I have a friend in Medical School and in the next few weeks she has to prepare for the big test they give you after two years of doctor school. I know she was stressing so during lunch I sent her an email...
I'm pretty sure Boards are pending next month so you and your gang of future doctors are taking refuge in the library trying to prepare. I'm not too sure what Boards are so I like to let my imagination run wild on it. There was a commercial a few years ago for the Marines where it had a guy climbing a mountain and at the top was a dragon and for some reason a sword and he picked it up and slew the dragon and when the camera panned back out he was in his Marines uniform. That's kind of what I picture Boards being. Slaying a magical dragon that makes you into a Marine.
I even capitalized Boards to show it the respect I'm pretty sure it deserves. I want to create something famous and call it Boards so the medical community must think of another name for this big dragon-slaying test of theirs. Perhaps I'll create the ultimate board game, so ultimate that it requires multiple boards, more colored pieces than a crayon box, and so many dice that the ridiculous amount of dice the game comes with isn't enough and you have to steal the dice from all your other board games. It will put Monopoly, Life, and Risk to shame. And it wont take 4 hours to play a full game, but it could if you want it to. Its very fun. Its for ages 1 to 96. 97 year olds need not play Boards because they will not like it. And its not like how Candy Land is for 3 and Above and then you play it at 24 and you are reminded how f**king easy Candy Land is. Boards will evolve with you through your life.
There would be tournaments that would be televised and wars would stop when it showed. It would bring the world together in peace, until the game ended which would then erupt in a brutal nuclear war between the country that won and that which lost. Boards is a serious game to be played, but it can also be taken casually as a way to spend a quiet afternoon with your grandmother, as long as she under the age of 97. Games like football and soccer would vanish from the world's view, and video games would not longer encapsulate our youth, the entire populous would flock to Boards. And it wouldn't cause mass obesity because Boards can be as physically brutal as rock climbing a marathon, and that's not even for the advanced play settings.
Some people out there may not enjoy Boards, but they will be out casted from their families and loved ones and form a colony of people known only as "The Others" which are not spoken of while playing a game of Boards. Eventually men will roar, women will swoon, and children will laugh with glee at the one game which above all else will promote the quality of family and friendship and can also be used as a drinking game.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Saturday, April 12, 2008
Big Change
I have a new job!
Sadly, I'll no longer be scanning documents for a living. I know this might upset a number of you out there that had paper scanning needs and thought you had an in. I'm sorry to disappoint. If it were up to me I would be there to help you out, but the world moves in odd ways and I've decide to go in a different direction. Is it a mistake to leave the glorious world of mindlessly scanning documents 8 hours a day? Yes, it is. But its a mistake I have to make for myself. In a years time I will probably look back at this post and wonder what was going through my brain that drove me to this decision.
Its no joke that since I've hit regular employment this was neglected. I hope this does not reflect on how I will care for my future children, but let's not kid ourselves, after two months kids lose their novelty and they're not really any fun until they can look after themselves and get you things from the store when you feel lazy.
May 28th I head down to Georgia until September 30th. I know I'll have access to computers and stuff and I'll try to put things up letting everyone know whats going on and still giving you what you come here for; 37 seconds of distraction.
All questions, comments, or concerns should be sent on an 8x10 of any celebrity with the first name David, written into a rap song, recorded and uploaded on a muxtape, or if you want to be boring, you can leave it in the comments section. But that's pretty lame.
Sadly, I'll no longer be scanning documents for a living. I know this might upset a number of you out there that had paper scanning needs and thought you had an in. I'm sorry to disappoint. If it were up to me I would be there to help you out, but the world moves in odd ways and I've decide to go in a different direction. Is it a mistake to leave the glorious world of mindlessly scanning documents 8 hours a day? Yes, it is. But its a mistake I have to make for myself. In a years time I will probably look back at this post and wonder what was going through my brain that drove me to this decision.
Its no joke that since I've hit regular employment this was neglected. I hope this does not reflect on how I will care for my future children, but let's not kid ourselves, after two months kids lose their novelty and they're not really any fun until they can look after themselves and get you things from the store when you feel lazy.
May 28th I head down to Georgia until September 30th. I know I'll have access to computers and stuff and I'll try to put things up letting everyone know whats going on and still giving you what you come here for; 37 seconds of distraction.
All questions, comments, or concerns should be sent on an 8x10 of any celebrity with the first name David, written into a rap song, recorded and uploaded on a muxtape, or if you want to be boring, you can leave it in the comments section. But that's pretty lame.
Tuesday, April 01, 2008
Cleanliness is Godliness and God is Billy Corgan.
I need to buy soap.
I put it up here for a few reasons. The first is my hope that someone will read this and then proceed to ask me if I have yet to acquire soap, to which the answer will either be to the affirmative or remind me that, I do indeed, still need to buy soap. The second is connected to the first that I really do need to buy soap. It would also be helpful to note that I am running low on shampoo as well. Picking that up while I was out buying soap would be the most effective way for me to solve both of these problems. So hopefully after someone reads this entry they will choose to ask me if I am in possession of replacement soap which would start my pilgrimage to the store to buy said soap and then, if they would have the decency, chose to wait ten minutes and call me again asking if I have picked up shampoo since, at that point, I should be in the cue at the checkout line with my soap having completely forgotten about the shampoo until the phone call which would remind me that I should make a shampoo purchase as well.
My life is a lot like the game Mouse Trap, if the marble dropping off the slide doesn't hit the level holding the diving man just right, he won't hit the cup, sending the ball doesn't the chute, knocking the pillar, and trapping the mouse. And if you're anything like me, you could never get Mouse Trap to work properly.
Hope that's not a bad sign.
Between the job, the gym, and now training Brazilian Ju-Jitsu three times a week, I've been having a hard time figuring out when to get any thoughts down on here. I seriously stand in a corner and scan documents all day with no access to internet or the outside world. I don't even have windows and normally I'm the only person in the office until 1:00 or 2:00pm. It gives me a lot of time to think but most my thoughts revolve around "why the f**k am I stuck scanning documents?!!"
I never want this to become a "This Is My Day" kind of site, so bear with me and I'll figure something out.
I put it up here for a few reasons. The first is my hope that someone will read this and then proceed to ask me if I have yet to acquire soap, to which the answer will either be to the affirmative or remind me that, I do indeed, still need to buy soap. The second is connected to the first that I really do need to buy soap. It would also be helpful to note that I am running low on shampoo as well. Picking that up while I was out buying soap would be the most effective way for me to solve both of these problems. So hopefully after someone reads this entry they will choose to ask me if I am in possession of replacement soap which would start my pilgrimage to the store to buy said soap and then, if they would have the decency, chose to wait ten minutes and call me again asking if I have picked up shampoo since, at that point, I should be in the cue at the checkout line with my soap having completely forgotten about the shampoo until the phone call which would remind me that I should make a shampoo purchase as well.
My life is a lot like the game Mouse Trap, if the marble dropping off the slide doesn't hit the level holding the diving man just right, he won't hit the cup, sending the ball doesn't the chute, knocking the pillar, and trapping the mouse. And if you're anything like me, you could never get Mouse Trap to work properly.
Hope that's not a bad sign.
Between the job, the gym, and now training Brazilian Ju-Jitsu three times a week, I've been having a hard time figuring out when to get any thoughts down on here. I seriously stand in a corner and scan documents all day with no access to internet or the outside world. I don't even have windows and normally I'm the only person in the office until 1:00 or 2:00pm. It gives me a lot of time to think but most my thoughts revolve around "why the f**k am I stuck scanning documents?!!"
I never want this to become a "This Is My Day" kind of site, so bear with me and I'll figure something out.
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