Sensing an Inquisition

Koalas must have very clear sinuses.

One of the people in the house is sick and everywhere I go, I smell eucalyptus. It's one of the many herbal remedies passed down from generation to generation like applying aloe to a cut or pulling out. In all the unique smells that pass through the olfactory factory. eucalyptus is one of those hated. Your sense of smell has the most influence on your memory and your ability to recall different things, and I associate that smell to being sick. For this reason, and warrants out for my arrest for two separate incidents involving the tranquilizing of a full grown kangaroo in order to ship home for use as a Valentine's Day gift or boxing buddy, is why I'm fairly certain I would not enjoy Australia.

I've always had a pretty good sense of smell. If I walked outside I could tag exactly what stench was in the air be it chocolate or a mixture of baloney and gasoline, both of which were an option on certain days during college. Sometimes these smells would bring me back to a time of family vacations up at the lake with the smell of gasoline off a boat engine equalled a good day on the water. While other times I would be reminded when I had to find a friend with a car that could keep a secret after getting a whiff of a certain perfume.

If you were told to chose which sense to go without, most people would chose either taste or smell. Touch is important for many reasons, most of which for guys revolves around any type of fondling of boobs, because we see touch more as a hindrance. If we were playing football with the guys and suddenly my tibia is sticking out, it is my wish to be able to finish the game before going for some gauze. With a sense of touch, instead of cowboying up, I'm probably only going to last another play or two.

Hearing is important, but it would be sweet if I could make it so I only hear the tone of which someone was speaking without having to listen to all those words. That way I could still react properly to whatever she was saying and I could play Mad Libs in my head while you tell me about the creepy guy you saw out in the bushes, no really, call the police, get a bat, I'm not kidding, there's a guy outside with a knife, what's that noise, oh my god I think he's found a way in, no please don't, ow I've been stabbed, screaming, why are you doing this, more screaming, help me. Sometimes I like time to get inside my own head. It's not that I don't want to listen to other people; I just like the sound of my own voice better.

Sight is tricky. On one side of the coin without it I wouldn't be able to see and a lot of the things I enjoy doing involve my ability to perceive the world around me using light refracted through my corneas and processed by the occipital lobe of my brain. But on the other hand, I could get a helper animal. Most blind people go with dogs because they're big enough to stop you from running into traffic unlike a spider monkey which would, sadly because of genetics involving hair growth, be unable to guide me by sitting on my head and grasping chunks of hair driving me like Voltron. That's why I'd want to help a helper orangutan. It would be like having a hairy butler. He would help me around the house, guild me safely across streets, and if it were a cold, dark night... and I felt a bit blue... I could cuddle with it.

Being able to sense ovulation in large zoo animals isn't very common so I won't waste time on it, but I wouldn't give it up for anything.

Taste is the most useless of all the senses. Thinking about all the new textures in the world for your tongue to experience is enough for me to elect for it to be removed. Ever wonder what sand paper would feel like on your tongue still warm from finishing off a newly stripped table? Perhaps your curious if bathing yourself like a cat is better for your skin? Or maybe you want to make out with your dog, just once, just to see what its like. All of these things, and more, are open to you without a sense of taste.

All of the senses are important, but not essential. To select one to go without for even a short period of time would change your view on life. So I pose this to you now, which would you chose?